The break up has been very difficult for me.. :(

Will I ever learn to trust again? I loved him so much and we talked a lot about future plans.

All I can say is it's been 2 weeks and at least I survived this long..

Not with the most healthy coping mechanisms like binge eating but better than not surviving :(

Today I twinned Angelic Pretty's Melty Chocolate with a new friend. We felt it was the perfect occasion to go to the Dandelion Chocolate Factory Tasting Tour.

It was really peak twinning... because it reminded me of old coordinate pictures of Angelic Pretty when they were at their peak.

During the factory tasting, I learned a lot about how chocolate can taste. Here is a map with the different flavors you can experience from tasting chocolate.

Honestly I don't think I could be a chocolatier lol. I don't like chocolate that much actually haha. And it was hard for me to identify the flavors like floral, fruity, etc.

But I had fun and my appreciation for chocolate grew. The tour guide gave us chocolate that was from the same bag of nibs, but they tasted very differently because the chocolatier had opted for different flavor profiles. I'm not sure how they do it considering the chocolate only has 2 ingredients... so there is quite a science to it and really made me appreciate the complexity of chocolate.

After the tour, we had dessert at the Dandelion Factory too, but we both forgot to take pictures LOL. They even had a smore and torched it for me! :drool:

And because that wasn't enough food :sweat:, we went to Tartine Manufactory for dinner.

I hadn't been to Tartine before, but I knew they were famous for their bread and cookbooks!

The bread... was goooood. It was normal (maybe sour dough?) but it was really rich and smelled like croissant!

It was late when we got home to take coordinate pictures. We decided to use flash to take photos like an old style digital camera hehe. Do you like our coordinate photo?

Honestly, every day is so hard right now. I can't stop thinking about him. But today was a good distraction. I'm really glad I got to spend time with a new friend.

˖ ݁♬⋆.˚𝄞. Faye Wong - Eyes on Me ˖ ݁♬⋆.˚𝄞.

Final Fantasy 8 song sang by Chinese singer Faye Wong. She used to be very prevalent in Hong Kong pop. There's a lot of longing in this song... goddamnit I just wanna be loved romantically.

Welp, knowing my shitty luck.. we knew I'd be back..

I am no longer with my boyfriend.

It's not healthy, but I find it very difficult to be single.. I just need to feel chosen, need to feel I can share something with someone all day long ><

I need a man to handle my shitty status updates all day long lollll~ like oh I'm drinking tea now. oh I went to the museum! oh I'm eating a sammich now

holy cow do I sound so unbearable..

This bf... he used to read my blog and one time I posted something very distressing and he was the only person that noticed and consoled me. It meant a lot to me. I don't think he reads this anymore ;_; I truly love him though ;_; and don't think I can forget him :(

The good news is a lot has changed in the positive direction in my life on the whole... I finally started my egl brand this year. It's very small, but I've been doing in person markets! I'll be starting an online shop soon. So please stay tuned!

I'm very proud to have gotten into some higher caliber events in such a short time too. I really hope my brand can deliver cute things for you ><

We used to have home pages.. and webpages all about us. Somehow we traded it for endless scrolling and instantaneously likes.

Does anyone miss the lost art of blogging?

Somehow I feel like lolita and blogging go hand in hand. There are so many activities you do as a lolita such as tea time - enjoying simple sandwiches and pouring tea for yourself, it's not a practical meal you have quickly. It's a meal you take time with and you think and absorb what's going on around you.

And blogging is a slowed down activity too. You take time to think about what you want to say and prepare accompanying pictures. You can make a long statement for people to really get your message. You don't just post pictures and get likes right away.

I miss when you just shared content you liked... not for likes or clout, but just because.

Hm, I forgot to announce that I'm in my sweet lolita era now! Here's a picture of me in Angelic Pretty's Wonder Party. It's sooo cute ><

˖ ݁♬⋆.˚𝄞. Hinoi Team - Aishiteru ˖ ݁♬⋆.˚𝄞.

Got back into Eurobeat idols again :sweat: Some melancholy feeling to this song... fitting cos it's called "I love you" and I just broke up lol.

p.s. I am honestly really struggling with this break up :((((