I went to journal with a friend today and you know, she reminded me I have a lot to be grateful for about this year too..

I don't think I fully announced it, but rabbit reverie, the brand started this year <3333

Here's a picture of my first order!

I am proud of how the packaging came out!

Lune designed the assets for me ^___^

I'm unsure which direction to take with the brand, how much lolita it should be.. I feel anxiety because that is where my heart is, but I'm not sure if I am capable of that and if the community would be receptive to it.

For now the designs are more casual or cottage-core (?) leaning.

The beginning of the year was really hard for me emotionally. I feel guilty, but my emotions have stabilized and calmed down a lot that I am able to be more productive and I feel a lot more happy (I gained a lot of weight in the process though cry). The problem is a lot of it depends on my new date (we're not bf/gf atm). I cannot depend on a person to make me happy..

But, but, but, hear me out... he really is sweet and makes me feel like I'm not a horrible person and am actually deserving of love.

He doesn't breadcrumb me and makes me feel so special ._.

I wish I had a normal childhood, family, or friends that made me feel that, but alas..

Since it's just the beginning stages of our relationship, I really don't know how it will end up.. I'll have to remain strong whatever the outcome.

He's the first man that has made me feel like I'm not needy or too much. It means so much to me.. I was often scared to be myself and often shrunk my needs.

Funnily enough, I rejected him after one date because he was too polite and quiet for me.

But he still talked to me and remained consistent. Which is really what I need. Someone that will be there for me despite my ups and downs. It meant a lot to me when I posted something distressing here, but he checked up on me. I feel like someone actually read this lololol.

He's a really positive person, but also patient and really nice.. I could learn a lot.

I sewed a lot this year, I don't know if I should give credit to my date or not on that :sweat: Looking back, I'm still not happy with the progress, I hardly did anything this year when it comes to that kind of stuff and I hate myself for it really. Reminder, to try to be okay with myself..

I hope 2026 will be a better year for me overall ^_^

I purchased a home this year too and my dog kitkat just turned 1! I wanted a dog so I could be less anxious, but you know how pets resemble their owners lolol..

˖ ݁♬⋆.˚𝄞. Girl's Generation - Girl's Generation ˖ ݁♬⋆.˚𝄞.

One of Girl's Generation's first songs ^^ I really like their songs from early in their career.

I'm caring less and less about conventions when it comes to lolita...

As I shared it was a difficult year for me and I lost a lot of friends. I think being with myself helped relieve some hidden pressure I had to wear lolita in a more cookie cutter way.

One of my favorite purchases this year were these JW Pei shoes. I love how they are casual, but work well enough with lolita... they're super comfortable and I can easily go all day walking 10,000+ steps a day in them. In fact, I even hiked in them!

In this picture I also have all my keychains on my Hello Kitty purse too hehe. I think such "cute" things are not really classic lolita, but I don't care.

Maybe I get a pass because cute keychains are the trend lately, but I _started_ before that hmphmphmphmphmphmphmp~~ I'd like to think that anyways :sweat_smile:

Recently I've come to like knee high socks in lolita too ^^ It's kinda faux pas to show your knees in lolita.. but I think it's adorable ^^

I'm only 5'2", but somehow my knees end up showing a lot? Oh well.. I like it ^^

I also recently completed the above blazer and skirt set by Innocent World. But to my astonishment, the blazer and skirt don't completely match in color which is a little sucky. But honestly, another thing I don't care about is things matching in color super well. It's just too tiresome wasting money like that finding things to match things so well.

It feels ultra consumerist. I previously really wanted some lolita things.. but I have some sort of (inferior) versions of them and I should try to just be happy with that.. It's hard because I've collected lolita for over 10 years. I don't see myself downsizing or selling soon.. Still, one doesn't need so much. I feel like I should set some rules around what I buy going forward :sweat: :sweat: I'll have to think about that~ I really want to focus on sewing and only making purchases for that ^^

˖ ݁♬⋆.˚𝄞. strawberryjam - Pom Pom ˖ ݁♬⋆.˚𝄞.

we have a very unrehearsed song sang by me </3